I did it like this, I did it like that……..

Found my phone, just needs to charge. Classes went well. What really amazes me is how much community college is just like high school. Okay, it doesn’t amaze me that much. As I sat and worked on my homework, I couldn’t help observe the many groups of what seems to be recently graduated high school students. This is expected, because really I’m the odd man out. I am the monority. What really confuses me, is how these people pass these classes and more, what classes are they taking? I sat outside working on my crossword, and couldn’t help overhearing a woman complaining about her Spanish class. I quote, “In Spanish the “H” doesn’t make an “H” sound, but the “J” does. Why wouldn’t they just have the “H” make an “H” sound. I had to laugh a little bit because I imagined a group of people that meet and determine how languages are spoken. “Well, I know you American’s use the “H” to make a hu sound, but us Spanish speakers really like the letter “J” for that sound. Actually we really dislike the “H”, so we aren’t going to pronounce it it all. Plus, we get funding by “J” if we use it, soooooo, sorry.” She was telling this to a guy who up until two seconds before that, was talking on his hands free cell phone contraption (also known as wizards ear) to some female that obviously had his attention. He said things like, “of course I will help you move” and “I just wanted to say hi before I go to work at 11”. (It was 10:30) Soon after he hung up (or however you end a wizards ear conversation) these two started talking. He was telling her how multiple female friends called him the previous night needing consoling for various reasons. I started to zone out a little because I felt nauseous. So here they were, she complaining about the “people” that make decisions about foreign language, he talking about how much of a D.B he was and how his pony tail made him look like a sleaze bag. So, I know I was obviously listening in on some one else’s conversation, but they were sitting about 30 feet from me and talking loud and clear enough for all to here. I had to move eventually because I couldn’t figure out a four letter word for a hammer head part.

I came back to that spot a while later only to hear a sleaze bag in training tell some stories to his captive audience of people in need of some self esteem. Once again speaking loud enough for all to hear. He was actually louder than the first guy. He was in the middle of some story of a hit and run, where he was not he one who ran. It surprised me too. Then he started talking about his legacy in high school. Apparently his friend was “talking Sh*t” about him to his sister who was still in school. His strories were not as cognative as the first guy but I could still tell, he probably likes Insane Clown Posse. He also slammed a guy into a car and then alluded the police by hiding in a tool shed for three hours. What a catch! This guy had such bad luck that someone made a “rap” that somehow misrepresented this young man. So, he did what any one would do, he went over to his “pad” and smashed all of the “demos” with a bat. Of course there were no other copies because the demos were apparently not backed up on the computer. They “were saved on his homie’s computer.” Once again I had to leave.

So, it really baffles me that these characters are in school. I don’t mean to sound pretentious, but when do they have time for homework? What type of homework do they get? I mean I could see, finishing your home work when you get home from the toolshed or consoling your female friends then turning a bad situation into a study group. Maybe I’m just jealous that I don’t have homies and don’t think outside the box when it comes to demos or the Spanish language.

SQL? I haven’t seen the first one yet.

My original goal for this blog was to write an entry every day. Oh well.  The summer term started again, so this week was little crazy, not to mention the three day party we call a wedding. I guess I did just mention it though. I have a full schedule once again. Let me break it down for ya.

English- I have the same teacher this term as last term. He’s a pretty stand up dude. I particularly wanted this class because he doesn’t like any of the books he has to choose from. What does that mean? No book. This could possibly be the best news of this term. Not only do I not have to spend 1oo big ones for a used book that probably won’t be used again, but that’s one less book that I have to lug around. All of the readings are online and one of them is an essay by David Sedaris. I like this teacher’s moxie. In a way he’s giving the Eng. department a big middle finger. This is something I would like to think I would do if I were a teacher. Why is it necessary to pay out the anus for a book that ends up being “useless” for the next term because the department decides to use a “new” edition. I think it boils down to a pay to play scandal. I plan to investigate this further. I’ll let you know how it goes. As for the class, hopefully it turns out to be everything I always hoped for. Which happens to be an A. Side note, we just had to write a response for “A Modest Proposal” by Jonathan Swift. I found it hilarious. Check it out.

Database Design- This class seems like a good time right? What’s better than learning Structured Query Language? This is another good class that just does not have a book required. On top of that, the teacher made a deal with the class that if homework is being turned in on time, we only meet once a week. Googly Moogly, that sounds like a sweet deal. We’ll see how this class goes, I am already using SQL developer at work a little bit. This teacher is going to have us use SQL+ first in hopes of teaching us the hard way first. I am also working with at least one employee from Oracle at work. Now who do you think is providing us education material in class? You guessed it, the giant we call Oracle. This class should prove to be very helpful. Now I can make nerdy jokes like……..well, I’m not sure yet.

Spanish- This class my prove to be troublesome. Even though I have grown up in a city where the Spanish language is all around me, I speak none of it or shall I say cero. For some reason when forced to take a language in high school, I chose German. Luckily, I sat next to nice young man who also never took Spanish in high school. Guess what? His fist language was Spanish. His family is from Puerto Rico. I thought, “Oh Sheeeeit.” Actually this guy apparently does not remember any of it. The language he took in high school? Russian. Awesome. When the teacher suggested that we exchange phone numbers with the person next to us, my new friend just awkwardly sat there. So I just sat there. He then turned to me and said, “I hope you’re not offended because I don’t give you my phone number. I’m just not very outgoing.” What? I should have said thank you sir, you just gave me some meat and potatoes for my blog. Instead I just said, “That’s cool.” I shouldn’t complain, one time I sat with a guy who wanted to exchange numbers in case one of us missed a class. Here I am two terms later and I still get retarded texts from him about blondes and dumb sex jokes. So, no harm, no foul.

Math- This class just is. Nothing exciting here. Same old stuff. Show up, blah, blah, blah. Don’t miss a quiz, blah, blah, blah. She likes Pink Floyd, which could prove to be good or very bad. She is also the director of Scrabble Society. I can’t remember if it is called a society or not, but it’s exactly what it sounds like. Apparently members (the average age is 68) get together and……well play Scrabble. Sound like fun? Let me know and I will tell her that I know someone who needs a friend.

Sociology- I actually haven’t started this class yet. It’s an online class that doesn’t start until June. I’m guessing it’s a class where they teach you to socialize, which is a class I really need.

An update- I lost my phone, so sorry if I don’t call you back.

Adios

Today in History

I’m tired. On Saturday I joined the ranks of all married people across the world. I’m still waiting for my dowry. I’ll let you know how that goes. I am still amazed at how much goes into a huge wedding and then in 8 hours it’s over. The best line was from my new father in law. When I asked, ” We’ve spent the past year preparing for this and now it’s over.What do we do now?” He replied, “I guess get on with your life.” So, I’m back to my life. Or at least my blog that I’ve neglected for so long.

So here’s some trivia for you. Twenty years ago today, Henry Geonaupolis invented a safer way to preserve shoes and other garments of clothing when he developed a substance in a pouch that could be shoved into shoe boxes and other packaging. Before this, a dangerous substance was used that could not be touched by human hands. Although his substance could still not be eaten, it waqs a huge leap.

Forty years ago, Gene Gladstone submitted his first version of his new invention for an official patent. It was a new design to help food vendors and restaurant owners cut down cost for eating utensils. Today we know it as a spork.

Fifty nine years ago, Jennifer Flange organized the worlds first job fair. Although no one showed up, she viewed it as a step forward.

Twenty seven years ago, in Tacoma Washington a beautiful baby boy was born. He would grow up to be a charming man with the best blog on word press.

This ride aint free

Every morning I shave. Almost every morning. I’m not sure why, but I hate shaving. It doesn’t casue me pain or anything, I just hate it it’s anoying. I noticed that I do something funny while I do it though. I tell knock knock jokes. Just kidding, that’s not funny. For some reason, when I shave my mustache region, I shave right up the middle first. I have this fear that if I start on each side and work towards the middle, my electric razor will die and I will be stuck with a patch of hair right in the middle. Yes, like Hitler. This is worry is probably not valid because I could always finish with a regular razor. This got me thinking this morning. Hands down Hitler was one of the most terrible men to live on this earth. No question. It’s just interesting to me that if someone has a mustache like that, racism is the first thing that comes to mind. Also, was that fashionable then? I mean I guess it was sort of right? What about Charlie Chaplain? My head is pretty much bald by all definitions. If I wear glasses and wear a diaper, will Ghandi pop into peoples heads?

Anyway, I started thinking of mustaches after that. As much as I think mustaches are great, they are really sort of a pain in the ass. A while back I tried a beard for a while. It wasn’t so bad. Of course some of my friends wondered about me. Not because I grew a beard, but because I couldn’t really grow a beard. It came out really splotchy. Eventually it looked better, but it took a really long time. I had made a deal with my lady friend that when I shaved it off, I would leave a trucker/70’s mustache like this.

Of course, I obeyed, expecting to just shave it off right away. It was amazing how fast I became (for lack of better words) attached to it. I soon discovered how much of a pain it was to shave around it everyday. If a stoner at Subway is considered an artist, I was a Stache Sculptor. So, I soon shaved that off as well. This is not to say, that I don’t respect a well groomed push broom. Magnum PI, enough said.

For me personally, I think either shave everything or nothing at all. (Except my crazy bushy eyebrows) I am partial to this one.

It’s also interesting to me that at some point having a mustache went from being manly (think Burt Reynolds circa 1975) to being creepy (think Burt Reynolds circa 2009). The exception is the indie band/hipster stache. It really amazes me how a mustache can change how someone looks, sometimes making them unrecognizable. Case in point, Curtis James Jackson III.

Sorry, Fitty, but you look like someones boyfriend at Sing Sing. I’m not really sure when it happened, but we really did decide that at some point it was either ironic or inappropriate to have a mustache. Perfect example: When I told my future old lady that I wanted all of the groomsmen to grow a mustache for the wedding, she almost threw up. Thirty years ago she would have said, no but because it would make it hard to pay attention to me with all of the hot staches behind me. So, no crumb catcher for me.

Mustaches, creepy or cool?

Talk amongst yourselves.

Nothing Important

Just a couple of updates. I finally scanned a picture of the “Lulu”  the horse that eats salad.

Also, I saw that dumb cat again. This time it was hiding under our deck in the backyard. I didn’t realize it was there until it shot from underneath me and ran out if the yard. Not before it caught the attention of my brown dog. I thought there was going to be a blood bath, but alas brown dog is not as fast as a cat. He was close though.

I decided I would showcase my favorite t-shirt website. My love for witty t-shirts is borderline un-healthy. I’m also quite a snob about them too. I get teased by some of my inner circle for my t-shirts. Not because they’re not funny. Believe me, they’re hilarious. Most of the jeers are because that’s almost all I wear. I dare someone to find a t-shirt in my closet that does not have some sort of graphic on it. My favorite site is busted tees, they reference all sorts of pop culture from the 80’s to now. Like this one I like to wear whenever possible.

I love this shirt. I found that it is best to wear this while traveling through airports. Nothing brings a smile to a TSA agent like this shirt. I love it because these agents are paid to “check you out” in  all ways possible. I’m sure they’re trained to look at everything including what passengers are wearing. So I love to see the agents reading my shirt as I walk through the metal detector, then all of a sudden, they smile and say something like, “I love that show!” Others just write it off as some obscure joke. I say, if you don’t get it, you shouldn’t be working with the public.

It’s not all fun and games, though. Much like this blog, whenever you out do the last joke, you set the bar just a little higher. People obviously find me very hilarious, so I am constantly out doing myself. Could you handle the pressure. Probably not.

Here’s another one I like

I don’t have this one, but respect all that do.

Gotta keep it short today. I’m very busy on the account of my many friends and my extreme popularity.

I’ll leave you with this one though. If you don’t know what this word is, ask your parents, one of them are bound to know.

 

Mass Transient

So it’s Friday. Another week down. No work today, just chores, and errands. It will probably be hot today. It was hot yesterday. I was walking to the bus after work yesterday and realized there was a pretty good breeze going. Then, I realized it was a hot breeze. Besides the fact that “Hot Breeze” brings to mind terms like, “Hot Carl”, “Hot Air Balloon Ride”, or a “City Bus Ride”, it means that summer is on it’s way. Summer here brings things like wind that doesn’t seem to cool anything. There are times when you’re driving down the road and instead of using air conditioning, you decide to roll down the windows. Even on the freeway, the breeze is warm. The only way I can describe it is to say it’s like being in a convection oven. Pretty cool huh?

Speaking of City Bus Rides, I have been using our public bus system as my primary means of conveyance when it comes to getting to work or school for almost a year. It’s actually not as bad as it seems. I get a pretty good walk in the morning and the afternoon and I get to work on the daily crossword. I know that sounds like some sort of ad trying to convince people not to drive. Since I generally like to people watch, it’s actually kind of fun. In order to avoid unneeded conversation with strangers, I bring my i-pod. This is usually a good sign to people that I can’t hear them and maybe don’t want to. We’ll get to that later. The people I see on a regular basis gives me a bank of good stories and helps me start conversations by saying things like, “You wouldn’t believe what I saw on the bus today.” Some of the people are regulars like the pretty obvious cross-dresser/transvestite (I haven’t explored the details). This umm person is of ummm African descent? Talk about a politically correctness quiz. She is always sauntering up to the bus stop as early as 7 am. The best part is that she dresses in a half shirt, short shorts, and heels. Keep in mind, this is not in a seedy part of town. this is right in front of the journalism building at the University. I like to just stand back and watch sh-im sexily walk past a collection of college students and morning commuters. Another regular is the older lady that sits towards the front of the bus and rants and raves about government, and just anyone who was “wronged” her. She seems pretty normal, until she starts talking about how she “knows her rights”. She never seems to get off at the same stop each time I see her. I start to wonder, does she just ride the bus to strike up conversation with the drivers blatantly ignoring the “Do not talk to the driver while bus is in motion” sign? Getting off the bus when she feels like the conversation is dead and waiting for the next bus in hopes that the next bus will have a more understanding driver. Hands down, the funniest part of this lady is when she really gets going, talking loud enough for everyone to hear. Eventually, some one who is as equally “a mess” as she is, jumps in and starts to give their two cents on the subject. She then gives them a sort of look that says, “What the hell are you talking about.” At that point the other person is going full speed down crazy street with some personal story. At this point this lady just sort of shuts up and looks very uncomfortable as if she was just minding her own business the whole time.

One thing that blows my mind is the increasingly common request for a cellphone. It used to be that people would ask, “Do you have a quarter?” or “Do you have some change so I can call…..” Now people blatantly ask, do you have a cell phone I can use. This is all sorts of crazy. Who would blindly give up their phone to someone? I could understand if this happens once or twice, but this happens a couple time a month. This causes me to constantly keep my phone on vibrate and to not answer it on the bus. It also confuses me that people come up and ask me a question, usually regarding spare change or a spare cell phone while I have my earphones in. Isn’t it common knowledge that if someone has head phones on they are trying to ignore people?

One time I was on what I like to consider one of the seedier lines. It makes more stops, therefore picks up more “characters”. As the bus pulled to it’s next stop, there was a “gentleman” with a large backpack and a “lady” behind him. They were obvious in some sort of argument obvious by the way he was waiving his hands at her. When the bus stopped, he turned away from her and and started sort of waving his hands behind him. Almost shooing her away. The same way someone discreetly tells their friend, “Just stand back, I’ll handle this.” I imagined him telling her, “Be cool. I’ll get us on the bus, just be cool.” As he started up the steps on the bus, the bus driver put his hand out in a stop motion and said, “Hold on.” Of course, listening to music on the bus has it’s disadvantage because I couldn’t hear exactly what was being said. I could have taken the earphones out, but I was telling myself, “Be cool, the driver will take care of this.”  What seemed to transpire was some sort of argument of whether he should be allowed to bring on his bottle or not. I have to give the driver credit, because he somehow was able to spot this bottle in the hobo’s pocket. The argument seemed to get somewhat heated, when finally the driver said, “Get off the bus!” I forgot to mention that the bus was not too full. There was maybe 10 people on the bus. A fairly “built” guy across the aisle from me stood up suddenly. He turned around, looked at someone in thr back, and made a “come on up” motion with is head. My thought was, “Come on, really? You’re going to get into it with this guy? Mind our business.” I notice at least one of these guys had a gun on their belt. By the time I noticed that the first guy was ordering this hobo off the bus I started to realize that these guys were undercover cops. The basically pushed this guy off the bus. As we started to pull away, the cops were ordering the hobo and his lady friend to put heir hands up. I felt like maybe this was a little overboard, since the guy didn’t really do anything, but at the same time I felt safe, then ashamed for thinking like that. Is this really where we need our vice squad? Thwarting the dangerous hobo crime ring? How many large drug deals are happening on the bus?

Oh, dear. It seems that I have rambled on for too long. I should have my blogging license revoked. I’m need to go, I’m supposed to meet some guy on the 766 line to buy some guns.

Equine Pride and Domestic Violence

Every once in a while, I have one of those days. Yesterday was like that. I just didn’t want to get out of bed. To top it off, I read the paper and saw two things that made me think I took crazy pills. And O.D’d. The first thing I saw was a picture of a man at an outdoor table with a horse standing next to him. At first this didn’t seem extra strange. Our state is filled with quite little mountain towns that this might be acceptable. Before I read the caption, I pictured a small town, in the middle of nowhere. Where things move just a little slower. Henry, the local bean farmer, rides his horse into town everyday to say hello to Cletus the store keep and plays a game of chess or two, while enjoying a sandwich and an iced tea. His horse Strawberry just sits patiently, getting the occasional bag of oats. This version sits well with me because it seems believable, yet still a “cute” story. The actual caption read something a little different. I wish I had brought the paper back home with me last night, so I could scan the picture. The website is not helpful with finding  it either. So Iwill update later tonight. Like I said, the actual caption read something like, Joe Cowboy and his horse, Browny sit at a table outside Saggio’s. Hold the phone Saggio’s? For those that may not know, Sagios’s is located across from the University, in a neighborhood known as the student ghetto. I know to those that have never been here may feel like riding horses through town is not crazy. Well it is. This area of town is a somewhat residential neighborhood with a lot of businesses geared towards college students. The all night dinner, the inexpensive Greek restaurant, and Saggio’s the pizza place. So there’s this guy, sitting outside with his horse, having a slice. I obviously decided to read on. Turns out, it was not a story, it was just one of those pictures with a caption they put on the front of the metro section. Let’s pause for a second here. Would you put a picture of a man with his horse on the Metro Section? Remember, metro is short for metropolitan. Metropolitan meaning, Of, relating to, or characteristic of a major city. I would not say horseback riding is a characteristic of a major city. Anyway, it was not an actual story. Not to say that I would consider that actual news, but don’t tease! The caption explained that this gentleman likes to ride his horse a lot. What? Obviously he likes to ride it. I was struggling with questions like, “Where does he ride it from?”  Surely he doesn’t keep it in the alley behind his house, which is actually a converted detached garage behind a bigger house, but has it’s own house number with a  1/2  after it. (common for this area) Granted the rural area is not too far from here. Maybe a 15 min  drive. The key word is “drive”. I could just picture him riding his horse in the bike lane, just tak’n life easy. This is not normal. Why would the paper print a picture like this and not expalin further? They would not print a picture of say a pool filled with trout, and say, “A local apartment building has a swimming pool with trout. People fish in it.” So I read on. About the time I started to accept this, I came across an advice column. I usually read this not to get advice for myself, but just to see what this lady thinks people should do. It’s also the equivalent to reading the tabloids in line at the grocery store. It’s just there, why not read it? So, to paraphrase, this guy was writing in about his abusive wife. Totally not funny, and it would not be fair to say this is bizarre or strange. The funny and strange part was the situations in which she gets abusive. This guy explained that one day he was working in the yard and decided to take a break to hit some golf balls into their field. (they probably have a horse) His wife came out took his golf club and hit him in the leg with it and told him to get back to work. He goes on to explain that she thinks this is funny and always laughs after hitting him. Another time, she made crab legs for dinner, and he jokingly said, “Is this all there is to eat?” She then hit him in the head with a crab leg and he had to to get stitches. This made me laugh. The last example he gave was when he was typing on the computer and she came in and hit him in the head with the keyboard. Of course, the advice was, to get help, call this number, blah, blah, blah. I know this was good advice and he should probably follow it. His wife sounds like a Biotch. Still, dude, a keyboard? A crab leg? I would say, “You need to tell your lady, look you gotta stop hitting me or I’m taking the horse and staying at Saggios.” I know this is actually a problem he needs to deal with, but dude, you may not want to write into a public advice column. Even if your name is Black and Blue from Indiana.

Lame-o

I’m running  a little behind today, so I just decided to mention a band I’ve known of for a while, but recently started to appreciate. Vampire Weekend. I heard them on All Songs Considered, and kind of liked them. Then, I began seeing them everywhere on TV including SNL. It seems nowadays SNL has been featuring hipster bands and I don’t like it. I also don’t like that I like VW (is it still lame to refer to a band with initials?) I listen to a few programs from NPR during my walk to the bus. They include Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me, This American Life, and the very pretentious All Songs. Usually when I hear a new band I like on All Songs, I feel proud of myself for knowing of some obscure band. Now I just feel ashamed. I feel like I need to take a shower to wash off the stink of  thrift store blazers and single geared bikes.

Still, I really like this band. Or at least the new (ish) album. I generally don’t like “hipster rock” and am generally bugged by it. Especially when they are featured on certain live comedy shows on Saturday. Kings of Leon, bugs me. T.V on the Radio, bugs me. I guess when it comes down to it, I dislike all trends or people that showcase being elite. Come on, you really think you are soooo much better than everyone? The Goths already do that bro. So, go grab your Interpol CD, throw your scarf over your t-shirt and just leave. No one wants you here.

Still, I endorse Vampire Weekend.

Your own Beeswax

Did you know that May 5Th is not actually Mexican independence day? So why do we celebrate it? My theory is that we as Americans just like an excuse to drink and dress up like some other culture in a very embarrassing way.

It’s also a pretty good excuse to have a margarita for lunch. I wonder how toady’s festivities will be effected (or is it affected?) by the hog flu. Oh, wait the news lady just said festivities are cancelled, but quote, “Life is slowly getting back to normal.” I was worried for a second that the violent shootings in northern Mexico would stop forever.

With that said, this morning I witnessed a cat dropping the kids off at the pool (not so much a pool, but a hole in the ground) in my next door neighbor’s front yard. The funny thing about this, besides the fact that poop is hilarious to me, is that the neighbor on the other side of me recently reported this vandalism to me. I ran into him the other day while watering the front yard. He is the king of casually bringing things up, in order to confront me on something. He commonly asks me if I ever let my dogs outside, because they “Look out the window sooooo longingly like they are saying, ‘Help me.’ ” I wanted to respond by telling him that a) my dogs go out constantly, and the mass amounts of animal waste in my backyard is proof and b) mind your em-effing business. So, this cat he tells me, “Digs holes in the front yard and poops in them”. He kept asking me if I had seem this cat. I continually told him, no I had seen no such cat. After he repeated this scenario over and over again, I started to realize that he was really asking, Was it YOUR cat? Anyone that knows my live in lady friend knows that no cat would ever be allowed in our house let alone in our front yard. Finally I flat out told him, “We don’t like cats”. Of course he responded by saying, “oh, it’s not yours?” He then went on to tell me how he was going to wait for the other neighbors to come out to get their paper etc. and confront them about this situation that seemed to rival gang violence and drug deals. Needless to say, we are planting large bushes along our wall.

So, this cat. My first thought, when I witnessed the defecation, was, “Someone needs to control their pet.” Then I remembered growing up with cats. As a kid, our cats were mostly outdoor cats. As any cat owner knows, once your feline gets a taste of the outdoors, there’s almost no turning back.

Once when I was a kid, I got a call from our neighbor across the street asking to talk to my mother. After I informed her that no she was not in, this lady proceeded to tell me that our cat had been in their back yard recently, and just that morning there was a dead bird on the kids’ swing set. What is it with neighbors? She should have thought about how our cat was protecting her kids from violent gross birds. Even as an 11 year old, I wondered, “What does this lady want me to do about it?”

Thought for the day: Dogs bark, cats dig holes and poop in them/kill things on your kid’s toys, neighbors get in fights in your driveway on Halloween. It’s just life.

RSVP’d Off

Alright I’m here. Incorrect grammar and all. I’ve been assured that no one blogs on the weekend, so consider my guilt washed away. I do feel bad that my blog was not typed this morning before left the house. Instead today’s entry is a little late and is being typed in, let’s say an “office setting”. So, what’s new with me? Not much.

Oh except that I’m getting married in less than 13 days. Pri-T crazy. Everything is going pretty smooth, except for RSVPs. For most of my life I didn’t even know what it meant, let alone stood for. I now know that it stands for Reserve your freaking Spot Very soon or die of syPhilis. That’s what it should stand for. This is karma for the years that I never RSVP’d to anything. Birthday parties, weddings, bar mitzvahs, and work are just some examples of what I should havebut did not RSVP for. Why RSVP you ask? Because, it’s polite and the right thing to do.  

Okay, so honestly, not a huge deal, but I think people really should know the value of RSVP-ing. Before I go any further I should say, this is in no way directed at my wonderful guests who DID send back their RSVP card on time. Coincidently, the only people that read my blog, all RSVP’d way before the deadline. Way to go, friends and family.

So I decided to get some input from a expert on this subject. When I say expert, I mean the first person who comes up in a Google search for RSVP etiquette. Here we go…..

Nina Calloway from About.com says this, “Once upon a time, people didn’t need response cards. When they received a written invitation, they would RSVP on their own stationery, offering congratulations and whether or not they would be able to attend.”

Oh, sweet baby jeebus, I could not have paid for a better article to come up! Actually, I havemixed emotions about this. My first thought was towards some of my guests, “you sons-of-Bees, how would you like it if you had to do that?” Then I started to think of how I would like it if I had to do that, and I wouldn’t. I would be the A-hole that shows up to a dinner party with no place to sit and no place card. Then I started to think about how none of my friends would do that. Nothing against my friends, but I have never heard of this, so how can I expect them to honor this tradition? Okay what else does Calloway have to say?

“Particularly if you are inviting a large number of families with children, you may wish to include separate lines reading:
Number Attending Ceremony _______
Number Attending Reception ______

 

Some say we messed up on this part, so touché Nina, touché.

 Bottom line, let me apologize for all the parties that I did not RSVP for and if you don’t already, please RSVP for stuff. Every time you don’t, a groom gets yelled at. Oh and just in case your wondering what RSVP stands for check this out.